About two months ago I heard from a mutual friend that two of our high school classmates were coming to town for a week or so. The dates were a little unclear and I didn't know what would be planned. One of these women was my best friend in high school. She and I were new to the school as juniors and we lived just a few houses apart. I think we gravitated together not only because we were new but because we both had moved around a lot and neither of us had ever made a really close friend as a teenager.
As it turned out, we had nearly all of our classes together. That brought us closer because we could do homework together and we were able to share our lives. She was one of four children, not the oldest, and I was the oldest of five. We had a lot in common.
The day after graduation, she moved back to her home in Utah with her family. This was less than two months after my father died and about two weeks before my grandmother died. I had so many losses that summer, including two good friends-one my age and one a couple of years older.
What I didn't realize until yesterday was exactly what her loss meant to me. Oh yes, we stayed connected as our lives flew by. She married before I did, but her oldest son and my daughter are only 6 months apart in age. She went on to be a stay at home mother of 9 children. It's only in the past two years that she finally became an empty nester. We sent newsy little Christmas cards but other than that, our lives were full of the things that keep us each busy as the months and years pass by. On Friday, my friend called me and she said she couldn't wait to see me. I can't tell you what that meant to me.
Yesterday, I went to our mutual friend's house and there she was...looking much like I remember her. Funny how the years seem to melt away. We laughed like we did all those years ago, only now our stories were full of kids and grandkids-she has 22 and two more on the way-and funny things that happened to us in those two short years we became so close. She came here for dinner last night and we talked for a couple of hours about everything under the sun. I didn't feel the least bit strange just talking with her about all kinds of things. It was like the years had never passed us by.
Today, we had a picnic for the exchange students. It was one of those mandatory things and it was fun, but I also knew I was going to a small open house at our friend's house where several of our other classmates were going to be meeting the Washington State friends. I got there about two hours after everyone else, and when I got home, my husband asked me if anything was new to report. There wasn't. It was mostly just looking at the yearbook, wondering about this person or that, and a large part of the time, I kind of felt out of place because most of them talked about things that happened years before I ever lived here. It was interesting listening to them talk about teachers and people I didn't know but at the same time, it was sad because I didn't have the connection to them the way they had to each other.
I only had those two years, and much of that time was spent living in a home with death too nearby. But I had my friend. She's a good Mormon woman and I'll never forget my father loving her and calling her "that damned Mormon". For a 17 year old girl, she took his teasing in stride, and in fact, she sent a card after his death and signed it "that damned Mormon". My mother loved and appreciated that card so much. Such a nice, thoughtful thing for a young girl to do.
So around 8 this evening, I had to say goodbye to my best friend again. Everyone was crying. This time we all knew, I think, that at our ages, we might never see each other again. After all, it'd been 41 years since the last time we hugged goodbye. And she lives 3000 miles away...so far.
But I saw her. We talked and we both realized that our friendship was stronger than a few years passing by. I plan to make a real effort at keeping closer touch in the future. You just don't know how much time you have.
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